These past 24 hours have been the hardest that I have faced in my lifetime. I am trying to get used to the culture and ways of my host family and trying to stay sane at the same time. Moving in with my family was the hardest transition yet. They do not understand why I eat so little and why I am so homesick, why I cry because I miss my mom and friends or anything else for that matter. I am hoping that as the days go by, it will get easier for me to cope with. As for now, it is hard to keep my eyes dry and a positive attitude on the situation. I’m scared for my safety in this neighborhood but more scared that I am or already have offended the family.
I miss my home so much. I miss everything about it. I miss my mom more than anything though, and I’d give ANYTHING just to have her here with me. I’ll never let go of her again, so long as I live. I want to spend every waking minute with her by my side.
July 1, 2000