Mom

Suns

Posted on by Lauren

Don’t get me wrong.

I definitely have those pangs.

The weird desire to smell just inside the crevice of their neck, cheek-to-cheek. 

*Inhale* their sweetness.  

Feel their entire fist upon my finger . . . 

But miss those days?

Count me out.  

With four daughters, all I’ve heard is warnings of teenage days to come.

My oldest is only eleven and I’ve had to put my foot in my parental mouth more times than I care to count so I dare not assume I know better than my foremothers.  

But, I admit. . . 

I look forward to the future more than I look longingly backward to their baby days. 

Perhaps it is because I had the opportunity to experience babyhood four separate times.

My friends with twins remind me that although they were awarded double the experience at the same time, they wished they’d had the opportunity over time.  

Lord knows, I got that time- I was pregnant and/or nursing for nine years in a row.

Instead, I revel in witnessing my daughters grow into young women- their passions, insecurities and questions.

I walk alongside, offering assistance as needed and hopping in bed to cuddle when requested.

I have such faith that they will continue to shine

So, forget the mirror.

Hand me my shades.

Here come my suns.

Camille Vaughan Photography

Gift

Posted on by Lauren

There’s a reason the stewardess instructs you to put on your own oxygen mask before your child’s. 

You are no good to anyone when you’re passed out. 

So, today, when I told my therapist that my doctor explained I was anemic at my latest physical, she chuckled, “Well, that’s telling, isn’t it?”

As a universal donor, I’ve been donating roughly every 8 weeks until recently, when I was turned away for low iron.

There’s always a shortage and since I have the blood everyone needs, I always say yes.

But the theme of “taking care of myself” has been commonly discussed during therapy so it came as no surprise to my therapist to learn I had once again, run my well dry. 

It’s all about setting healthy boundaries.  

Pouring into my cup first, before sharing with others. 

“I can write a letter, if you need.” My doctor offered. 

I laughed, “No, I’m a big girl.  I can tell them No.”

A hard word for me to ever say. 

There’s always a need.

But I want to be here for the long haul, not just the present emergency. 

So, I set boundaries. 

I say, “No.”  

I take care of myself.  

And in the end, that’s my greatest gift to others. 

Camille Vaughan Photography

Moms

Posted on by Lauren

“You’re such a good mom.”

They say to me with awe and pity.  

And I wonder, 

If you were me, would you do anything differently?

I’d like to think not. 

My child, with food allergies, gets invited to a birthday party.

Of course I bring her own cupcake- dairy, egg, peanut and wheat-free. 

This is our normal.

And yes, it’s hard. 

But if it were you . . . 

You’d do it, too. 

We’re Moms. 

It’s what we do.   

Camille Vaughan Photography