Homeschooling – New Leaf Parenting

I can see her now.

Sitting on a landing, just outside her window; her legs folded closely to her chest, her arms wrapped securely around them. Her forehead pressed against her knees.

She is so very lonely.

*********************

I can see them now.

Four little girls, each creative, unique and beautiful soul looking to me, their mama, for guidance.

When the pandemic hit, I cradled those babies in my arms, protecting them from the dangers that lie outside our loving nest.

But life, ever-changing, continues.

And lately, I’ve come to the stark realization that in my desire to protect my children, I am, instead, preventing their growth.

How will they learn to adjust, when they are always accommodated?

I thought quitting homeschooling mid-year was the equivalent of failure.

Now, I know that doing the same thing over and over, when it isn’t working, is the definition of insanity.

In this case, quitting isn’t failing.

It’s adapting.

The course we are on is no longer what is best for my children and while making that pivotal turn towards something new is scary, it is also necessary for their continued growth.

*********************

I approach that little girl on the landing, placing the palm of my hand on top of her head, whispering,

“One day, you’re going to be a mommy to four little girls and as much as you are going to want to shelter them, you don’t have to worry. They will never be lonely. Because they will have you.”

New Leaf Parenting.

Every Day is a Fresh Start.

Turn the page.

Start a new chapter.

Let them fly.

One year ago, in the face of a dooming pandemic, I made the difficult decision to homeschool.

I worried.

Oh, I worried.

I worried about FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out). I worried about them becoming hermits, afraid of unfamiliar shadows. I worried about them being taught by their mom, because as a former teacher myself, I know the power of a teacher’s ability to reach students in a different way than other teachers, parents or friends and I wanted that for them.

In all honesty, I still want to be that for other students.

I worried about them being left behind, especially as they witnessed their friends still attend our beloved, local school.

Ultimately, I went with my gut and we had an incredible year.

Spring arrived and with it, the hope of the pandemic’s near-end.

I started to prepare the girls for their return to school in the Fall, casually mentioning how cool it would be to wave to their friends in the hallway on their way to P.E., Music or Art class. Did they know the Fall Festival was already booked for this year? Were they looking forward to the Fun Run?

But upon Summer’s dawn, doubt settled in.

A vaccine, that I had traveled to another state to get just so I could get it as soon as possible, was available and yet, less than half the country had opted to receive it. The country was split- my body, my choice/ our country, our responsibility.

Now, variants are on the rise and social distancing measures, including masks are still required at school.

Holding a Masters in Elementary Education, I am in a unique situation.

My husband has worked from home since the pandemic began and I am able to stay home to teach with hired help to occupy the girls not currently in lesson.

Moreover, apparently I made homeschooling too fun. All three big girls have begged to continue; and while part of me felt that this was fear-based on having been away for a year, I couldn’t bring myself to convince them that their school could provide a better learning environment than what we had going on right in the Carawan Classroom.

My *entire* experience as a parent has been blessed with the wisdom of my elders: Don’t blink. Cherish these days. It goes by SO fast.

Combine the pandemic, the pressure from my children, the wisdom of my elders and my innate joy in continuing to teach my daughters, and here we are.

That time we homeschooled (X2).

2021-2022.

Let’s Go!